Emma's Testimony
One family at a church in the U.K. affected by deceiving spirits
My husband, Sebastian and I are going through a horrendous time at our church. Sebastian is a Deacon and preaches. I used to take Bible Studies and help lead the worship.
Our troubles started in October last year. We were invited to a leaders meeting at Derby Elim Church. We had already heard about the 'Toronto Blessing' and had read articles in the 'Mainstream' magazine. We thought that nothing like that would ever affect our Church.
We both prayed before we went to the meeting that God would protect us from anything not of him, and had an open mind on the subject. We sat there listening to the speakers, all of which had been to Toronto, one speaker related how he had been on all fours roaring like a lion. Another said of how he had seen many controversial things, things that had upset him, "But" he said, "I won't tell you about those, I'll just tell you the good things".
I thought that was so unfair of him as it denied us the chance to judge for ourselves. All the speakers said that they hated the first meeting there, and wanted to run from it, but they had to put their fears and hang-ups aside, in order to receive the blessing.
Afterwards we had 'Carpet time' all the chairs were stacked away. We kept singing an emotional chorus about being in Heaven, then the ministers came forward to pray. Perry, one of our Deacons was the first on the floor, he said that as one of the pastors approached him, he felt like he collided with a brick wall.
Then Corinna, our Pastor's wife went down, she laughed hysterically for ages, then started screaming and heaving, her face crimson. She went quiet, then started shaking, going into violent jerks, hammering on the floor with her hands then going into hysterical laughter again. This went on for a couple of hours.
During this time the man who had roared like a lion, came to pray for Sebastian, he started pushing him, telling him to stop resisting the Spirit. Sebastian thought, "I'm not resisting the Holy Spirit, I'm resisting you pushing me". He came back to Sebastian three times, the third time he went to hug Sebastian, but got him in a bear hug and forcibly tried to pull him over, he did not succeed and left him alone.
I was prayed for three times and felt absolutely nothing, I felt so empty, so alone, like I wasn't really there, I wasn't a part of it. Sebastian and I seemed to be the only ones standing. I walked into the 'Ladies room' in tears, I prayed, "Lord, why aren't you with me? Why have you passed me by? What have I done so wrong that you don't want me?" After praying I went back into the meeting and stood at the back, just watching.
For the rest of the week, I had the most terrible depression, I kept crying, couldn't sleep or eat properly. I struggled to look after the children and the house, I wanted to get away from everyone. Unknown to me, Sebastian was also under attack, he was having strong thoughts that he couldn't stop, strong lustful feelings towards a girl at work, and he struggled to pray, which just isn't how he is normally.
One Friday, the following week, we visited my parents, Sebastian broke down, asking Mum to pray for him, telling us all his troubles. I was so shocked. I had no idea, he kept it from me because of the way I was feeling, but immediately before mum could pray, his face lit up, "It's gone" he said, "Something has just snapped inside my head, my head is clear again". he felt so light. We talked all evening and I felt the heaviness lifting off me.
The next meeting at the Church was the Wednesday bible study. Our pastor, Rusty, wanted those who had been to Derby to testify. Ali, a Deacon, testified that the day after, he was so ill. had a headache and couldn't move, his wife had to phone the doctor. A few people at the Church laughed about this, and told him the he'd got drunk with the spirit that he'd had a massive hangover! This really angered me. Then Corinna testified that while she was laughed, Jesus came to her as a 1950's Rocker, with greased-back hair, put on a juke box and asked her to dance.
They all then expressed a concern that we had not manifested yet.
About twoweeks later we had a visit from the pastor of Loughborough, his arm shook all the while he preached, really irritating me, he related all his experiences to us, then prayed for us all. Again, people were on the floor, laughing, crying and shaking violently.
He then prayed for our son, David, who was five. David started to stagger backwards, he walked over to me looking like he was drunk, saying that he felt funny. That night in bed he started sobbing and getting distressed. I ran into his room, he was sat up, his eyes wide open. He said, "Mummy, there's a lion roaring in my room". I felt like a cold knife go through me. I thought, "What does he know about Lions roaring". This seemed to be one of the themes of this blessing, I asked him if he was really sure could it have been a car going by that sounded like a roar. This upset him even more and he insisted here was a lion roaring. I called Sebastian and together. We prayed, before we said "Amen". He looked up and smiled, "It's gone now mummy" he said, and went back to sleep instantly!
We decided then not to allow the children to be prayed for.
A couple of Sundays later, Rusty and Ali came to pray for us in Church, Rusty held my hands and started to pray until I had to let him go down. His wife, Corinna then came up to me and said "I'll pray for you Emma, I'll soon have you roaring!" "Corinna" I said, "Don't say that, you know how I feel about things like that." She laughed and then said, "Why don't you go down on the floor?" "Because God doesn't put me on the floor. I don't want to lie down."
She then retorted, "Do you have to wait until God breaks your will and your knees before you go down? Why not just go down anyway as an act of submission?" I felt shocked and hurt by this. She put her hands on me and immediately she fell to the floor, laughing hysterically.
Ali's wife, Sheila came across to me and said, "I'll pray for you, but I don't know what to say" She started to pray then went and sat down. Perry's wife, Ada, then came to me, "I'll have a go" she said all giggly. She placed her hands on my shoulders and immediately fell into me. I caught her around the waist and sat her down. She laughed hysterically.
The teaching about this situation is that if the person being prayed for doesn't receive then the person praying gets double blessing, their own and the person who rejecting it.
I went and stood next to Sebastian, on his left, as I did a hand came on my shoulder. I thought, "Oh no, not again" and turned around. There was no one there, yet I had a hand on my left shoulder. I felt so calm and peaceful.
It was days later I told Sebastian. He said that he didn't want to say anything to me, as he didn't want to spook me, but at that same time, he had a hand on his head and it gave him strength and a reassurance of God's protection.
The following Sunday, Corinna spoke of how Jesus is up in Heaven, not on earth with us, we need to direct our prayers to the Holy Spirit. She called for a rethink of doctrines. A visiting speaker corrected her about this, but the next week she was out the front calling on the spirit to come, like a chant. It sent me cold.
The last Sunday in March, my husband Sebastian led the meeting and preached, as Rusty and Corinna were away. It was dreadful, hardly anyone turned up. The leaders and wives stayed away. There was such a hardness and opposition, Sebastian had to fight through it. Afterwards we felt so depressed and exhausted.
The following Sunday was such a contrast, everyone turned up, singing with such enthusiasm and it was like an act for Rusty's benefit. We felt so rejected.
Sebastian had to take time off work to be alone and pray. During that week, Rusty and Corinna went to Sunderland for a few days to hear John Arnott. When they arrived back, Sebastian asked him how it all went. "I'm not telling you" he retorted, "You won't believe it" .
But on the Sunday we had a taste of 'it'. Corinna started praying for people. Ali fell to the floor jerking violently, like he was having a fit. His head was swinging back and forth, his breath coming out in gasps and grunts. Corinna continued to pray for him, wafting her arms up and down over him, he was getting worse, jerking more and more violently. Other people started shaking.
Corinna then fell to the floor shaking and drumming her hands. She then went into, what only could be described as an 'orgasm', moaning, gasping, waving her arms and legs about, then she went into 'Birthing'. She moaned and screamed, bearing down, her stomach muscles contracting, thumping the floor with her hands. Children were allowed to sit and watch! Rusty said "Don't worry about her. She's only giving birth to a new ministry! There was quite a bit of it in Sunderland". I walked out and took my children home. I was not going to subject them to that! I was so angry.
In the evening Sebastian went to discuss things over with Rusty and Ali. They tore into him, they were so offensive and critical and said that we ought to think ourselves. lucky that God hasn't zapped us dead yet, like Annanias and Saphira! We were so shocked and hurt, these were supposed to be our friends, we were especially close to Rusty .
Sebastian spent the next morning in prayer, Psalm 144 v 7-8 and 11, was his cry. God ministered to him through these verses.
On the Tuesday evening I was informed of a leaders meeting half hour before it started. I had no time to get a baby-sitter and Sebastian was out. He phoned when we came home, to be told he needn't go, but Sebastian takes his responsibility seriously and went anyway. As he walked in the house the atmosphere was so oppressive and hostile he wanted to come away. It turned out that Corinna had just been manifesting with another orgasm . Rusty remarked on how much of a "turn on" they are.
The following night was the Wednesday Bible Study at Perry and Ada's. Rusty played us a tape from Sunderland, with John Arnott. I was horrified at what I heard. It sounded like a lunatic asylum and a zoo. The atmosphere in the house was so hostile and oppressive that I felt ill.
After the tape. Rusty called for a time of prayer, then with such aggression, his face crimson he 'prophesied' "You Scribes, you Pharisees, you hypocrites, you Theologians, you with all your doctrines sewn up, Let go of my Church!! I'm taking her back!" This went straight through me like a cold knife, I felt it aimed at us.
He and his wife and the other leaders then went straight over to the weakest sheep of our fellowship to pray over her. In my mind I saw them as a pack of wolves pouncing on their victim. I walked straight out in a daze, I felt so ill. My mind was numb, my legs weak and wobbly. I kept praying for strength to walk home.
As I walked down the road my 10 year old niece saw me from across the road and kept calling to me. I was aware of my name being called, but my mind was so numb that it wasn't registering with me. I walked across the road and she ran up to me asking if I was all right. She then said "Auntie Emma, let me give you one of these". With that she flung her arms around me and gave a big kiss. "I think you needed that" she said. How right she was, I could have cried. She must have been God sent. Sebastian was concerned when I arrived home as I was so unwell.
The next Sunday Sebastian preached on Pharaoh's hardness of heart. Ali led the meeting first and really used up the time praying for people, as he placed his hand above their heads they started to manifest. Sebastian then placed his hand between the people and Ali's hand and the manifesting stopped, so Sebastian was able to preach. It was like two different spirits at work!
It was announced that the Wednesday Bible Study was to be at our house. When Rusty found out he was angry with me, as if I'd planned it, he told me he wanted it at Perry and Ada's again, "It will" he said "Make sure that the right people are there!!??" This really hurt me, What did he mean by the "right people"?
Sebastian went that night . He said that they were mickey-taking 'Normal Christians' laughing with contempt and mockery.
Over the first weekend in May, Sebastian attended meetings at another Local Church. Here he was disturbed by the preaching, with insults aimed at those against Toronto, mocking laughter, lack of respect for God's Word, and manifestations which actually frightened him. He was so saddened to see people, especially our own leadership going along with everything .
The following Sunday, Rusty preached on the 5 wise and 5 foolish virgins, and taught us that the 5 foolish virgins represented those who opposed this move and were placing themselves in terrible danger.
He also stated that 'the greater the manifestation, the more blessing and deeper the ministry they receive', yet all along he has stated that it's not the manifestation that matters, look beyond that'. After his Sermon there were 'Words of God' speaking against those who reject Toronto and rebuking them, and a prophecy which contradicted the Scripture. When Sebastian corrected his, he was told that 'he wasn't really prophesying, he knew what he said was wrong', and yet he never corrected himself to the Church.
The following Sunday during the meeting, the atmosphere changed, I had a deep sense of God walking out of the door, then there was like a deep sobbing inside me, like my spirit was crying, I still have this feeling, unknown to me, Sebastian felt the same. I know something happened in our fellowship that day.
At the end of May, Rusty showed us a video from a Sunderland meeting. One of the top men of our denomination was manifesting, and another pastor was referred to as the 'Conference drunk' because of his behaviour. John Arnott gave scripture references to back up this move, but they just don't tie up.
Sebastian found out by accident that there had been a leaders meeting, but he'd been left out, also they had all gone out to a special meeting and not told him. Rusty looked embarrassed but said nothing. Sebastian felt very hurt and rejected.
The first Sunday in June, during the meeting, Rusty came across to me, grabbed my hands and pulled me out. I don't want to be prayed for, so I started pulling back trying to grab Sebastian. When he got me to the front, he whispered " I only wanted to ask you a question". I felt so angry and stupid, he made me look a fool. Why, Why?? People were commenting about it afterwards. He laughingly said "I bet she thought I was going to 'Toronto' her". A member approached me and said, "I'm surprised to see you here, I'd heard that you'd both left, that's what I was told"
Sunday July 16th, Ali had another fit, Ada was laughing hysterically, whooping and screaming. This continued throughout the service. Everytime the words 'Holy Spirit' was mentioned she 'whooped' louder. Ali then 'prophesied' that the laughter is at those who reject this move, God is laughing at you! At this ,the laughing and screaming got louder. Rusty stopped a lady from asking Sebastian questions about this move.
Saturday 22nd July, Sebastian went to hear Ken Gott at Derby Elim. He was a bit disturbed at some of his teachings especially about a man crowing like a cockerel, and a man howling like a wolf, saying that these noises were prophetic messages from God!
Sunday 23rd July, I didn't go to Church this morning as I wanted to keep the children home, David has moved up to Ada's Class, in Sunday School, which we are not happy about . But Sebastian told me that Rusty, during his message, which was Toronto Sales talk, urged the Church to avoid those people who have not, or will not, receive the blessing. There was a spot of trouble afterwards as a 'friend' had betrayed me and told the leadership that I attend another Church on the Sunday evenings. This doesn't really matter as our Church doesn't hold evening meetings. Sebastian tried to calm the situation down, but Sheila wants me crossed off the cleaning Rota, telling my cleaning partner that she'll do it with her, as I've left, Sebastian urged her, that I haven't left, and I will be cleaning the Church this week
During this past year I have shared my heart with our pastor, but have had it thrown back at me. I have shared my heart with our leaders but have had no response. God has really ministered to me through Psalm 41 and 55, I wept when I read these and prayed them from my heart. Through these God has shown me that he's seen and heard every word, every action, every hurt, every tear.
We are really praying for God's guidance, as we are being forced out of our fellowship, and cut off from everyone. It has really broken our hearts. All I want to do now, is help people in the same position as us , and to warn people of the dangers and the errors of this move. There is such incredible pressure on people to accept this move, spiritually and emotionally, and such opposition and rejection when you take a stand.
Our pastor has become double minded, and contradictory. I have a deep frustration that we can't get through to those in our fellowship anymore, they have become spiritually blind, so hard hearted, and won't have anything to do with anything in opposition to Toronto. I know things are going to get worse, both with this move and in our fellowship, very soon we are going to have a clash with our leaders, which will be the final push out of our Church. Until then we will not give up on them.
Words of a song have really spoken to me:
"Fear not my child, I'm with you always,
I feel every pain and every tear I see.
Fear not my child, I'm with you always,
I know how to care for what belongs to me."
I know other people affected by this blessing, and I thank God that we've been able to talk with them and help them. All we can do now is pray and rely on God's help and guidance.
Thank you. God bless you.
Emma.